Modern Love, Modern Madness: Exercise As The Cure For Screen-Time Overload
The Modern Couple Madness: After a long workday, both of you come home feeling overwhelmed.
A brief peck on the cheek is all your energy allows. "How was your day?" you ask on autopilot. "It was..." But you’re already too busy scrolling through your phone to hear the answer. Before you know it, it’s time to head to bed.
Exaggerated? The reality is that modern couples spend more time on their screens—four times as much for those aged 18 to 34—than with each other. 1
It’s no wonder this creates a perfect storm of disconnection, putting the spark in their relationship at risk.
I remember from my own experience: We used to watch a movie together every now and then in the evening before it became an everyday ritual. One day, when I was about to turn on Netflix, she said, "Wait, I want to talk with you first." That was a necessary wake-up call for me.
I know it might not sound huge, but once communication fades, it often becomes just a matter of time before the relationship cracks. Emotional distance grows, leaving you feeling more like roommates than partners.
In addition to breaking our lazy Monday-to-Friday routine, we transformed our Sundays into something completely different: We started hitting the gym together. Motivating yourself to exercise alone is something few can manage, but together, it became easier.
I loved everything about it: Starting the day with a long and late breakfast, sometimes a nap, then I was hitting the weights while she hopped on the elliptical trainer, sometimes we would hit the sauna, head home, and then have dinner.
Over time her interest in strength training increased - I was always there to watch over her execution.
Our mood after the Sunday session: Satisfied, happy and relaxed.
We didn`t stop there but added 1-2 shared runs through a local park every week during the warmer months.
“As you carve out time in your days to make time to exercise together, you are also sending the message to your partner that you are making them a priority."2
There is no more valuable thing we can give out partners than time. Science proves we create a stronger bond by sharing activities.
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Why exercise together?
You spend quality time together while improving your physical and mental health. Pushing through an exhausting set leads to a connection that can travel over to other domains of the relationship.
But more important than that?
Working together on a goal that is future-paced is similar to making future plans as a couple - it`s exciting.
The need to scroll our phones to calm down after a stressful day - we all know that feeling. But the reality is that it does not help you wind down, and exercise is a much better way.
Imagine a conflict arising between you and your partner: The stressed-out self has a tendency to get emotional very fast (depending on the type of person you are), while a clear mind from exercise can stay calm and lead to a more constructive conflict resolution.
And that extra energy and confidence you both have from exercising?
Your partner will notice and feel attracted to you.
Too good to be true for couples with a kid or more than one?
Yes, I agree: Having young kids might not allow you to exercise together, but that time will come and before, you can negotiate both your window of opportunity to get in some steps or exercise.
If your kids are older already or you don´t have kids, then exercising together will be easier.
While the type of exercise is secondary, they yield different results.
Browse through the list with your partner and see if you can find something that you both would like to do together.
Cardiovascular Exercise (e.g., running, cycling, dancing)
Activities like dancing or cycling together foster teamwork and fun while improving endurance.
Strength Training (e.g., weightlifting, resistance bands)
Spotting each other in the gym builds trust and creates shared goals, like lifting heavier weights.
Flexibility and Mobility (e.g., yoga, stretching)
Yoga or stretching together fosters closeness and mindfulness.
High-Intensity Interval Training (HIIT)
It’s intense, fast, and motivating when done together, fostering mutual encouragement.
Low-intensity activities (e.g., walking, hiking)
A walk or hike together creates space for bonding and reflection.
Look to the person lying next to you on the couch: Did he/she ever bring up the idea of working out together or would you like to revitalize your relationship through shared physical activities?
Don`t wait any longer, it will never be a better time to do that.
When you invest in fitness as a couple, you’re not only prioritizing your physical health but also nurturing your emotional connection. It can bring that extra spark to make the connection between you stronger (again).
Take advantage of this opportunity to work on your health goals while building a stronger partnership.
https://www.directlinegroup.co.uk/en/news/brand-news/2019/couples-spend-4x-more-time-looking-at-screens-than-each-other.html#:~:text=Couples%20Spend%204x%20More%20Time%20Looking%20at%20Screens%20than%20Each%20Other,-4%20min%20read&text=Three%20in%20ten%20complain%20they,or%20arguing%20over%20trivial%20matters.